Chick*a*Dees: October 2008

My sister Amy tagged me with an introspective tag. I promised her that I would try to do it even though doing introspective things is not my forte. I tend to find things I should be working on or trying to do better when I examine my life very closely. And who needs that when Oprah is on soon? And there is an unopened thing of Ben and Jerry's in the freezer? Honestly, I just don't have the time to devote to bettering my life. Way too many important things to tend to. Like searching my files for 20 minutes to get that cute mama birdie (thanks Jenn). But here goes...

"Give a description of yourself including physical appearance (height, weight, etc), personality, likes/dislikes etc."

Sounds easy enough right? Then do it yourself. You are tagged. Ha. SUCKERS! Does that sound rude? It wasn't supposed to...you're just tagged, okay? So I called you a sucker, I meant it in the nicest way possible. :) see? Even added a little smiley face to soften the blow.

First up is appearance. I tell people I am 5 foot 7 inches. I am really 5 foot 6 and a half inches. I figure if someone really challenges me on the half an inch then #1, they need a hobby and #2, I deserve to get caught in the lie. But until then, I will keep faking that half an inch until the day I die. Or get osteoporosis and shrink to the point that it isn't believable anymore. Then I'll make up a new number. I also lie consistently about my weight. I had a seminary teacher once tell my class that little kids need a soft lap and and rounded shoulder to cry on. That when they are hurt they need a squishy place to land. I am holding hard and fast to that statement as a way to justify myself. I have spent a lifetime getting my feelings hurt and being upset over things people say or do that they don't even know are hurtful, or maybe they do. But I have come to a point in my life where healthy and happy are more important to me than the size on my tags... that will probably change tomorrow, but for today I am content with being my kids' soft place to land.

So on to my personality. In high school a friend, B.C. (initials used to protect the innocent, but if one of you highschool girls get it, I will give you a prize), told me that I was so crazy sober, he would LOVE to see me drunk. He invited me to his next party. I didn't go. A choice that I have choked down regret about all these years.. Not for the getting drunk part because I am quite proud of myself that liquour has never passed these lips, but B.C. had 2 false teeth on a retainer that he could flip around and have upside-down teeth or backwards teeth (and that gives the Hillcrest crowd a huge hint). I lived in a fearful awe of that retainer and had I gone to the party, maybe HE would have been drunk (which I don't even know if he really drank?) and I could have stolen the toothy contraption and somehow shaken the hold it had on me...but I digress. I have also been told that people don't know whether or not to take me seriously, that I can deliver a total lie with a straight face and they don't know whether I am kidding or serious. I used to take this as a HUGE compliment. I enjoy being able to trip people up sometimes. But it's come back to bite me a few times lately, so now I'm not so sure. Perhaps I should work on being more genuine (great. there goes Oprah and my Ben and Jerry's...unless of course Oprah is doing a show on gratitude journals or how to be more genuine...then I am GOLDEN). On the other hand, though, I feel that the people who love me and care about me know and get the real me...maybe that's enough. Because if it is enough, I still have time to hit the quart of ice cream. So yes. It's enough that the people I love know the real me. Now pass me the Cinnabun.

Likes and dislikes? Amy said she doesn't like it when people clip their fingernails in a restaurant. I have to say, I've never seen this done, but I am jumping on that bandwagon since I pretty much threw up in my mouth when I read it on her blog. I also don't like changing poopy diapers of kids who are not my own. My own kids, I can suck it up and get it done. But if I'm babysitting and a kid I'm not related to does a duty, I gag and dry heave like nobody's business (ha, business, get it? Like pooping is called "doing business?" it's a stretch...but funny if you make the leap). I DO like lots of things. I like a clean house and am very envious of people who have them (again, the Oprah and ice cream really cut into my tidying time). Visually, I like graphic stuff, like a really close picture of a lemon slice, or the big pop of a hot pink flower on a white background. Someday when I have time and a budget to decorate my bedroom it will be all graphically poppy (i think i just made up 2 words in a row!). Finally, I really like music. Indie Rock holds my heart currently, but I appreciate just about anything. Led Zepplin, Beastie Boys, Beck, Alison Krauss, and Feist are probably my top 5 bands/people of all time...but that list has slight changes all the time as well, and I could write a detailed essay on why each one makes or gets taken off the list at any given moment.

There you have it. Me in a nutshell. mmm...nuts...and caramel...with chocolate chunks.... Um. see ya. I suddenly have to go to the freezer.